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May 21, 2003
The Wedding: or, She's Gorgeous, They're Happy.
The wedding went off without a hitch.
our hair/makup appointments were kept.
not a single blemish marred our faces.
not a single spill spotted our costumes.
the photographer showed up a bit early and was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.
The limo showed up exactly on time and was clean and well-stocked (thanks to the maid of honor) with clear liquids, pretzels and fun music, even though I lost my copy of the bride's madonna CD.
we arrived at the country club and the groom's family was high with hilarity, the bride and groom's rooms exactly next door to one another, so they could do the adorable "peeking to almost see each other before the wedding" shot.
the weather was cool and sunny, the judge was old and had a sense of humor.
the groom's eyes nearly popped out of his head when the bride walked down the aisle. and he cried with happiness through the entire ceremony. She trembled when she spoke, but only cried a single delicate tear.
the bride's rack was absolutely stunning.
Groom, to Maid of Honor, during the 'wedding party all-dance' to 'Disco Inferno':
"I should have done this 10 years ago. I'm an idiot. I'm so lucky she said yes"
Maid of Honor:
"yes, you are an idiot. why aren't you dancing with the bride? And who chose this song? Is this the Travolta wedding?"
the liquor was plentiful. the food was delicious.
and then, the horror of the evening: the dancing.
I'm a pretty okay dancer. Not very graceful, but I can take a lead, and am slender and willowy enough to be flipped around at my partner's will. if they flip to a particular rhythm.
The date can't dance. Not a step. he claims to do a sort of 'jr high shuffle' but I never learned that one in jr high. we were busy doing some sort of pogo or slam dance at that point of history.
Did you know that southern men can escape high school without being taught ballroom dancing? Shocking!
Now, I admit, I told him I couldn't really dance. But then again, I told him I couldn't really drive.
"I can't really drive" means: "I can power a motor vehicle, but just not very gracefully."
Therefore, "I can't really dance" means "I can move around a dance floor, but just not very gracefully."
He never told me he couldn't dance, either. Here I was, all worried that I'd be clumsy, and he was trying to lead me through the jr high shuffle on the dance floor in front of the Bride's Side Aistaires and the Groom's Side Rogers.
I am ashamed to say I stormed him off the dance floor for a dance lesson on the veranda. He picked up the box step and ran with it. thank goodness.
and I danced with my father. who is a damned good dancer.
I've learned my lesson. never downplay your skills unless you're playing for money.
speaking of skills, and money, I've got a job interview today. a big one. with hours and hours of meetings, with committee after committee, and an intimidating presentation to give at the end. (check out my webcam if you want to see what I'm wearing - glasses, hair back, so professional) If you're feeling the vibe of good luck, send a little my way, won'tcha?
Posted by Heather at May 21, 2003 12:33 AM
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Comments
Good luck! I've been reading your blog for a while and thought I would post. Congratulations to your sister and all. Sounded like the perfect day for a wedding.
My website is down until I move in June, but check me out then if you want.
Kevin
Posted by: Kevin at May 21, 2003 01:33 AM
Break a leg Heather! And might I add, all of you looked racktastic
Posted by: Alex at May 21, 2003 06:19 AM
the bride's rack was absolutely stunning.
damn, you ladies don't mess around! glad to hear about the wonderful day...
Posted by: miss ellen at May 21, 2003 09:27 AM
The solution to all wedding dancing issues is two-fold: first, drink too much. Second, hava-na-gilah is always good for dancing, even if you're not jewish.
Posted by: brian at May 21, 2003 01:40 PM
You know, you talk about your sister's rack way too often. ;)
Posted by: Andrew at May 21, 2003 01:57 PM
andrew, did you happen to see said rack? cuz, man, that deserves to be talked about ;)
Posted by: miss ellen at May 21, 2003 05:02 PM
Wow. I have to admit — your sister's rack does look great.
Posted by: wildsoda at May 21, 2003 11:53 PM
I want to marry her...
...her rack
Posted by: ALX at May 22, 2003 09:04 AM
I must say though, you look great too. The whole wedding looks like a classy affair with beautiful people.
Posted by: ALX at May 22, 2003 09:13 AM
Okay, I confess - not only do I love my sister, I have a thing for a great rack.
but that's not why I talk about hers all the time. I probably shouldn't use my website as a forum for "in" jokes, but Jeffiner reads this site all the time, so I get a kick out of teasing her.
You see, a couple-two-tree of her friends are obsessed with their own breasts, and talk about them all the time - "did you see my boobs today? they're HUGE!"
Not kidding. I've been to brunch with these gals and they're always talking about how huge and amazing their tits are.
and they're not all that different from my sister's, except she doesn't talk about hers all the time. and my sister is a million times skinnier than these ladies, so you can even see her breastigial bounty to a better advantage, as it's not competing with a double chin or pooochy stomach.
so, I rave about her rack, not only 'cause I love her, and I think she's a dishy babe, but because she'll always call me up and laugh when I rave.
and that's a good thing.
Posted by: heather at May 22, 2003 11:48 AM
Say, thanks for all the flattery on the whole wedding day costume party!
Posted by: Heather at May 22, 2003 11:49 AM
So how'd the interview go?
Posted by: Kris at May 22, 2003 12:09 PM